Month: June 2023

gratitude-a-thon day 3,000: weather or not and life

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The weather has been tropical here in Boston. It’s that kind of humidity that makes your clothes feel like they’ve been Krazy Glued to your body. It’s that sweat-inducing stuff that makes your upper lip wet. It’s so steamy, you want to take a shower every few hours. But that’s not all, it’s overcast and dark one minute, then blue sky and sunny the next. It’s pouring rain, then calm and breezy. In short, it’s totally bananas and impossible to predict, other than it’s positively unpredictable. Also, we’re not a tropical area, so like, what”s with that? Yeah, I know, welcome to climate change.

But it is summer, which is my season. It’s confusing to me that I was born in the dead of winter, during a snow storm because there is nothing about this that’s copacetic with my being. I would think the great baby powers beyond would have brought me into the world on a day so sunny, everybody in New England would call in sick to work with a feeble excuse, put the wonky beach chairs and some PBJs in the car and head for the ocean. But no, my birthday always falls on a day that makes snowmen rethink their position in the world.

I seem to love to discuss the weather. Is it that it’s such a common thread that we all share, or is it because I am exquisitely sensitive to my surroundings? I think it’s probably both, but with the lion’s share leaning on the latter. I am the first to get hot. i am the first to get cold. And I am the first to complain about it. But recently, I’ve realized that the weather is just like life. (Maybe you already realized this?)

See, while we have meteorologists with fancy degrees trying to make predictions about whether we should bring an umbrella, or get out our Daisy Dukes, can anyone really, even scientifically, ESP what’s going to happen out there? No offense, Al Roker, but, and I’ll just speak for New England, as the famous Mark Twain quote goes, “If you don’t like the weather in New England, wait a minute.” My quote would be more like, “Who the fuck knows.” And that’s where the parallels to life come in. We think we can plan our little lives to go a certain way, but the unexpected pops out of nowhere, like a hail storm, the most perfect temperature can hit when you least imagine, thunder and lightning can crash even the most well laid plans. I’ve lived a few December days where even Santa has to replace his cozy red and white suit with madras shorts.

The older I get, the more I understand that it’s fine to plan your life, just not to expect it to go as planned. I mean it does, but it also doesn’t. And knowing this has made me more nimble, more prepared for tumult and unexpected happiness, and more grateful for when it does actually stick to my well-considered calendar of events. Mark Twain was absolutely right about New England, and about life, too.

gratitude-a-thon day 2099: the duke of dads

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We had an off-the-charts-fun father’s day this year. Honestly, the father in question deserves to be put on a pedestal, like Michelangelo’s David, because he’s got dad traits that make him one of those father’s you wish was yours. Or, just say, I wish I’d had a dad like Peter.

I didn’t know when I married him that he would not only LOVE being a father, but that he would embrace it like he was being paid Steph Curry’s salary to do it. When the kids were young, he would take time off from his job to be with them, and then stay up until 2 AM catching up on his work. He coached and cajoled. He could explain the impossible to understand homework concepts, in the most understandable ways. He taught them how to throw a baseball, land a basket, play soccer without their hands, and to never give up on the field, the court, or the classroom. His patience made a meditating monk look like a fruitfly.

I had a difficult dad. Looking back, I can understand why he acted the way he did, but it doesn’t make it any easier. All of which means, I can’t even imagine having the kind of relationship my kids have with my husband. To me it’s as foreign as finding a two-headed unicorn watering the flowers in my backyard. But I love it. I live for it. I admire what my kids get to have what I didn’t.

It’s great to tell your dad on father’s day how much he means to you, but honestly, it’s not enough. A good father is a powerful force in shaping a life, and a bad one is equally powerful……

My husband is too lenient, can’t stop subscribing to the “Protect Your Kids from Pain” newsletter (yup, sometimes his dadness can make me crazy), but he’s the kind of father that matters. He’s the kind of man who is consistent, and loving, and would do ANYTHING for his kids, including the ridiculous, the bizarre, or the semi-dangerous. I’m pretty sure he was born to be a dad. It’s one of the things in my life that I am constantly grateful for. Here’s to you, Peter, a fearless father, the most patient pop, the Duke of Dads. I love you. We all do.

gratitude-a-thon day 2099: a gratitude round-up (because who’s been a lazy writer……)

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I haven’t been writing about my gratitude lately, but I’ve been feeling it. Sometimes it stops me in my tracks, and I think, “Damn, wouldja look at this.”

Here’s a little rundown of what I’ve been noticing lately, but have not been blogging about (I’m putting myself in the naughty chair for this) on the gratitude front:

Sometimes when I’m in my car and it’s really hot out and I turn on the air conditioning and the radio, I think about how thankful I am for the blast of coolness and tunes. I mean, how great is it not to be sweating like I’m in a sauna while I drive around singing like a pretend Taylor Swift? Plus, double bonus gratitude points that nobody can hear me, because well, THE ONLY THING TAYLOR AND I HAVE IN COMMON IS A VAGINA.

Yup, here’s me in the car.

It feels to me like Daisy, who we’ve had for almost a year now seems to have been bred with us in mind. Her sweetness, easygoing and affectionate personality, and the “I love everybody” way she lives her life are one of those things I can’t help marveling at. I’m in a constant state of, “How did we get this dog? How did we ever get this dog?” This is a non-stop 24/7/365 gratitude. I mean, HOW DID WE GET THIS DOG?

My daughter not only graduated from law school a few weeks ago, a week later, she actually got a job! When you think about your little toddlers toddling, you wonder what they might become when they grow out of their diapers and into adult clothes. Because she was so adept at arguing, we’d always laugh and say she was a born lawyer. Well, it turns out she is, and her expert arguing is going to help people in New York city avoid getting evicted. Ally is a real combo of substance and style and yup I am feeling VERY grateful she is launching into a life of public service that she is wildly excited about. Good show, Al–no argument.

We surprised the graduate with her name in lights! (A little funny that she’s called Ally and she’s going to be doing work where she’ll be an ally. And no, I didn’t think of that when I named her.) As her party invitation and our kitchen party banner says, “It’s like if RBG & Elle Woods had a baby.” Yup, that’s our girl.

It’s Farmer’s Market season! I’m pretty sure there isn’t a vegetable I wouldn’t marry, so browsing my options makes me giddy. Also, it’s just nice to support people who work the land and grow beautiful food. So, yeah, a bushel and a peck full of gratitude on that front.

It’s summer. And I love all things that are summer, like the whole flowers everywhere thing, the beach, every inch of it, including the annoying sand. Vineyard vibe, Cape escape.. Who doesn’t want to pull out the flip flops. I adore an early morning of blue sky before the sun goes balls to the wall. I love a summer night with a little breeze. I even love a hot, steamy days (but only a few). As a confirmed winter-hater, summer is my season and I am here for every single second of it with a gratitude that’s Mount Everest big.

One of my favorite people just moved back from 10 years in California, and although she has literally about one million family members who love her, I believe I am the happiest of any of them that she’s back! Welcome home Colleen! “Meet me in the middle of the day……”

Lastly, how can I express the gratitude i have for Trump being called out on his bullshit? There’s nothing big enough that could hold my feelings of thankfulness that someone so evil is being exposed in a court (multiple courts, in fact) of law on all his lying and cheating about very serious stuff. Take the lid of the dumpster and uncover the garbage. Halle-gratitude-lujah.

Ok, ok, I’m going to write more regularly about all I have to be thankful for. And you, how have you been? Tell me about your gratitude. Oh, c’mon, it’s always better when you share it.