gratitude-a-thon day 589: to you, mom, the mother of all people


Hey Moms,

It’s your day. You know why? Because you took on a role that is so daunting, so often thankless, and so gosh darn important, you have convinced society to celebrate you for 24 hours. You should actually be celebrated for, like, a fucking year, but a day is what you get, so, like you so often have to do, shut up and make the best of it.

We celebrate you today, mom. Whether you are a stay-at-home, a work-from-home, or work from work version, a biological, adopted, or friend-in-need type, today is the day that everybody tips their hat to you and your multi-tasking ability, your selflessness, your really good mac and cheese. Today is the day that your children will be taken by the police and put behind bars unless they have purchased, or made you a card. Some of you may get breakfast in bed, others may get to go out to dinner accompanied by your brood, still others may be receiving flora, fauna, or bling. This is your day to shine, and I’m not talking about the silver mama, so enjoy your moment.


Today we stop and give thanks for your amazing ability to annoy and agitate. We put our hands together for your intuition, your guts, your sixth sense. We bow down to your laundry skills, and bed making prowess. Today we put you, however briefly, on a pedestal, for the way you grocery shop, and drive us to multiple locations while listening to music you hate. We envy your keen ability to make a boo boo go away with a kiss, and your reluctant acceptance of your post pregnancy body. We canonize you for always having to take out the dog, for letting us borrow your clothes (and ruin them), for continually having to empty the dishwasher. We treasure the way you can juggle life’s obligations with a kid on one hip and a career on the other. We adore you for nagging us to do our homework and clean our rooms, use manners, and take a shower, the stuff that will help us in our lives.

We especially commend you today, mom, for putting up with us, as we mature. We know we’re not that easy, and can be downright impossible. We marvel at your good nature, your generosity, and the way you have not given into the desire to smack us across the face on multiple occasions.


You are a rock star. You are the unspoken hero of our lives. You are the most special person we know.

And today, we tell you, even though the rest of the days, we just carry it around it in our hearts.

Happy Mother’s Day, Moms, all of you, every last one of you. Today is yours. And you deserve it (and let’s face it, so much more, too).

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