gratitude-a-thon day 521: what i know for sure, or don’t skip the fucking cake

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Oprah does it every month, so I thought here, the week of my 56th birthday (holy shit, fifty fucking six), I would tell you, What I Know For Sure (not that much, but a couple things).

1. Having a career you love is really something. Having people you love is everything.

2. Good hair always helps.

3. A dog is the best kind of people there are.

4. Fuck the forecasters, black is the new black. And it always will be.

5. A sunny day is an instant mood elevator. Take it to the top floor.

6. Nobody’s life is perfect. NO, NOBODY’S. I’LL SAY IT AGAIN, NOBODY’S.

7. A good bra. That is all.

8. Laughing daily might be one of the best things you ever do for yourself or others.

9. Exercising everyday will make you, and your health happier. (Dancing around your house like someone on the verge of a breakdown counts.)

10. Good coffee, or no coffee.

11. It really is about how we respond.

12. White teeth are a de-ager.

13. Crest white strips really work.

14. WORRYING DOES NOT HELP. I REPEAT, WORRYING DOES NOT HELP. Acknowledging a specific worry, and taking action on it, does.

15. Cellulite is not a character flaw.

16. Happiness is a choice you make everyday, every hour, every minute.

17. The beach is as forgiving, and life-affirming a place as there is on the planet.

18. Having kids is like having a great teacher for the rest of your life.

19. Karma is always lurking, act accordingly.

20. Essie’s nail polish color Waltz looks good on everybody.

21. A tan in a can can give you a sunny glow and save your ass from getting skin cancer.

22. Jewelry. Period.

23. Being nice can transform the world. (Think about if everybody was.)

24. Smiling can move mountains. (BIG, BIG mountains.)

25.  With every birthday, we are closer to the end of our lives: DON’T SKIP THE FUCKING CAKE.

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